The Yellow Page
Submitted for AngelGal’s Realm’s Mother’s Day Contest: Favorite Memory of Mom
My mother is the typical Asian mom. Growing up there were no hugs, kisses, or “I love you’s”. They just didn’t exist. They were never part of her world growing up in rural China. With only bare necessities to live, and little to resources in a tiny village, I’m guessing the culture and lifestyle didn’t leave much room for those things. So in turn, my upbringing was often void of emotional or physical affection. Even until this day, my mom expresses her compassion purely through actions.
At the end of my first week in kindergarten, I walked over to my mom in the kitchen and handed her a piece of paper. The yellow page was a notice listing all the supplies and requirements students in my class needed to have ready by the end of the week. I kept it hidden in my Care Bear folder with the intent of showing it her, but she was never home when I arrived home from school. Subconsciously, I think I neglected to show her to spare her from being upset about all the expenses for school. Every expense was a burden, and she always let us know it. So instead, she complained bitterly about me not bringing the list to her sooner. I remember lying in bed that night, crying softly into my pillow so my mom wouldn’t hear me. No one was allowed to close their bedroom door, so I buried myself under my covers and soaked my pillow in muffled cries. I knew that just outside of the room were my disappointed mom, and a brand new backpack…empty. I envisioned myself walking into a classroom full of children, each one with fully stocked pencil boxes and desks, and mine being empty.
I tossed and turned for hours, but finally fell asleep staring out my bedroom window. I remember looking up at the night sky and saying to my then 5-year old self, “I wish I didn’t have to go to school ever again.”
7am the next morning my mom gently pulled the covers off from my curled up body. I sat up for a moment as my head spun from all the crying, and rubbed my swollen eyes to see clearly
At the foot of my bed was my new red backpack. My mom leaned over and pulled it closer on my bed in front of me and unzipped the top. As I peeled away the front flap, all of my textbooks leaned forward, all perfectly covered with folded brown paper bags to protect the outside hard covers. Every last one marked with their subject title on the front with a Sharpie. Behind the books were a few crisp folders, slightly filled with wide-ruled lined paper. And in the front pocket, newly sharpened #2 pencils, safety scissors, Elmer’s glue, a ruler, and a coveted unopened box of Crayola crayons. I wrapped my hands around the box of crayons and pulled them up to my face and closed my eyes. Breathing deeply to smell the new crayons, I was overcome with how special my mom made me feel. After a few moments in bed to take it all in, I peered up at my mom and smiled…
She smiled back.
Back then my mom was a busy working mother of two, supporting a family and aging parents. A woman I have grown to respect and love even more now that I am a mother, regardless of her signs of affection.
She probably has no recollection of this day when I was just five years old. However, for me, it is one of my most treasured memories of my mom.
(I have hands, they were just cold.)
Wishing all the moms out there a wonderful Mother’s day weekend 
Your mom is so amazing!! God love her.. Happy Mother’s Day to you, and to your Mom!!!
LB’s last blog post..Heart 2 Heart Hug 2 Hug
May 9th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
What a great story!! I can tell how closely you hold that story to your heart! Just beautiful!! Thanks for sharing!
And happy Mother’s Day to you!!!
Sadie’s last blog post..Hai Ku - Lessons learned
May 9th, 2008 at 1:04 pm
This is a beautiful tribute. What a wonderful memory of how mothers are so capable at making things right. I hope you have a wonderful Mother’s Day yourself.
MommyTime’s last blog post..“To Go or Not To Go” Is Not the Question
May 9th, 2008 at 1:08 pm
lmao @ I have hands, they were just cold. that is a beautiful story sandy! you and your mom look gorgeous on your wedding day.
jameil1922’s last blog post..It’s on the Map!
May 9th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
That is such a sweet story. That reminds me of a few times I thought I knew how my mom would react to something and then she completely surprised me in a nice way.
Have a great Mother’s Day!
skiplovey’s last blog post..Clearly I wasn’t cut out for modelling, but maybe he is.
May 9th, 2008 at 1:26 pm
That was… beautiful! My heart was breaking for your 5 yr old self crying in that bed… but I knew your mom would come through.
and the pictures are great… your wedding picture is stunning! you are a gorgeous women, and all your wedding pictures are just stunning!!
Your mom is a very attrative women as well!
happy mother’s day!!
kiss that lil’ cutie!!!
hugs, jenn
Jennifer’s last blog post..Friendship Friday edition 4!
May 9th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Wow…that’s a really sweet story. Happy Mother’s Day to you too, Sandy!!!
Linda’s last blog post..Audrey Tautou to Replace Nicole Kidman for Chanel
May 9th, 2008 at 1:35 pm
And that story tied you for First Place, too. And may I add, you looked lovely with no hands and even lovelier as a bride. And your Mom ain’t bad, either.
Lou Lohman’s last blog post..Haiku Friday - what I am
May 9th, 2008 at 1:38 pm
That’s really sweet. Happy Mother’s Day!
Anne’s last blog post..Haiku Friday: My Family Vice
May 9th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
What a beautiful story, Sandy, I love it. Thank you for sharing that precious memory.
Kelly’s last blog post..Friday Favorites #27
May 9th, 2008 at 1:58 pm
Ooh I get all nostalgic reading about our deep roots from the other side of the world… My mother was not huge on physical affection when I was little either, I mean I wasn’t neglected or anything but since I’ve gotten older, I think I WAS the one who got her to open up more and be more ready with the hugs, kisses. Your mom taking the time to cover all your books…that’s a mom for ya. I remember when my mom would stay up all night sewing my new year’s party costume, I was always a snowflake lol. Happy Mother’s Day to your mom and you! Great post.
Jojo’s last blog post..Politics of Marriage
May 9th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
That was so beautiful. I have tears running down my face after reading it. The books all covered threw me right over the edge. Thanks for sharing it.
Domestic Spaz’s last blog post..Munchkin and the Fit
May 9th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
I was very moved by your writing. Great job.
OhCaptain’s last blog post..Leaving Las Vegas
May 9th, 2008 at 2:12 pm
That was so sweet - it was hard to keep from tearing up (and here I am, supposed to be WORKING at work). I think even more so because my Mom is/was the same. Definitely an asian thing. You know, those small actions always meant so much more to me than words ever would have anyway. And I think BECAUSE showing affection wasn’t a natural thing, we appreciate these acts of love even more.
By the way, you’re Mom is beautiful! I see where you and Ella inherited your looks *wink!
SherE1’s last blog post..Smoke On!
May 9th, 2008 at 3:06 pm
My mom was not great with the hugs either but showed her love in other ways. She did whatever it took to care for us making many personal sacrifices. Thank you for sharing your memories. She sounds like an amazing woman.
Christine’s last blog post..Testing The Water
May 9th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Beautiful post sweet. Hope you and your mom have a wonderful Mother’s Day;o)
Crystal’s last blog post..My Resimay
May 9th, 2008 at 3:40 pm
What a sweet story. She probably doesn’t remember because it was just another normal mom day for her, but to you…
HRH’s last blog post..Out and about…
May 9th, 2008 at 3:57 pm
Oh what a wonderful post
You should send her a copy so she can read it, I bet she’d be touched, even if she never mentioned it.
Marylin’s last blog post..Hai, kud I get some hair please?
May 9th, 2008 at 4:01 pm
What an absolutely beautiful post. Wow…I know my parents definately liked to show affection by actions rather than hugs and stuff. Made me think of them. Happy Mothers Day.
May 9th, 2008 at 4:06 pm
You better win that contest! I loved it. You better get something good on Sunday. Like a whole tire to go with the gauge!
Anglophile Football Fanatic’s last blog post..HF: A Wedding
May 9th, 2008 at 4:22 pm
This is such an endearing story Sandy, I bet your mom is the best mom ever! Give her a (virtual?) hug for mother’s day, and all of the other days ….
Jientje’s last blog post..ABC in pictures …. I is for Ice Cream
May 9th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
What a lovely post. Sounds like you may not have gotten a lot of I Love Yous said to you but you certainly get them in actions!!
Nola’s last blog post..Your Legal Minute
May 9th, 2008 at 5:33 pm
Very powerful and thanks for sharing. You and your Mother are beautiful ladies and I wish you both a Happy Mother’s Day!
May 9th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
What a lovely memory shared … along with two wonderful photos of you and your mom!!! I hope you BOTH have a marvelous Mother’s Day on Sunday ;–)
Hugs and blessings,
storyteller’s last blog post..HF #37 - Poetic Trio in a Single Post
May 9th, 2008 at 6:38 pm
What a wonderful story! And I just love the picture of you and your mom on your wedding day!!
I remember making bookcovers with paperbags because our parents never had a lot of money either. Homemade bookcovers were the best ones!
Jeanne’s last blog post..Amazing Discoveries
May 9th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
This story reminds me a lot of my mom. She wasn’t really big on affection or attention for that matter(mostly because she had 6 kids!) so when she would do something nice or spend quality time with me it was huge! Your story took me right back to my childhood and made me realize how busy my mom really was. Very sweet post.
I hope both you and your mother have a wonderful day on Sunday!
kspin’s last blog post..Pretty Things For You…
May 9th, 2008 at 9:45 pm
Your mom Asian… my mom Polish. They are much the same. And I am finding out that you and I have much in common too.
Happy Mother’s Day. MWAH!
OHmommy’s last blog post..Motherhood Has No Script
May 9th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
That’s just awesome. I could “see” the story in my head as you told it.
Rebecca’s last blog post..What does “o.k.” mean anyway?
May 9th, 2008 at 9:56 pm
Oh babe, what a beautiful, albeit bitter sweet memory. I have a similar one of when my mum let us play in the mud. We were never allowed to get dirty and we were terrified at first, but then she smiled and just watched us have fun without complaining.
I suspect she was drunk. LOL
Kelley’s last blog post..This is the way it is goin’ down, yo.
May 9th, 2008 at 9:57 pm
Great story…and great pictures of you and Mom!
Nap Warden’s last blog post..Holy LOST Batman, and Something for Me
May 9th, 2008 at 10:56 pm
What a tender story. You and your mother are both gorgeous! Good luck in that contest…my fingers are crossed for you.
Jennifer H’s last blog post..Performance Anxiety (my 100th post in 100 words): PG-13
May 9th, 2008 at 10:57 pm
hi Sandy. thanks for always dropping by our site. i checked, we haven’t x linked already right? we’d like to..if it’s ok with you.
so how about it?
Borski and Nai’s last blog post..Friday’s Feast 190
May 9th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
This story made me cry. Truly. What a special thing she did for you.
Jen of a2eatwrite’s last blog post..Punk’d
May 9th, 2008 at 11:26 pm
Good Lord, you both are soo beautiful! Happy Mother’s Day and BEAUTIFUL post!
Ashley’s last blog post..So much for the bottoms
May 10th, 2008 at 12:07 am
What a sweet memory. It’s true that actions speak louder than words.
Holly’s last blog post..Wherein an electrocuted iguana ruins my lunch
May 10th, 2008 at 12:13 am
hi..thanks for the comment..added you up already in our blogroll..hope you are up to adding us in yours as well..thanks Sandy..
gbu!
Borski and Nai’s last blog post..Friday’s Feast 190
May 10th, 2008 at 12:31 am
That’s a great memory. Thanks for sharing it with us!!
For me, such memories help to dilute the resentment of the lack of affection, the frugal way of life, and the harsh criticisms, especially now that I am grown and have my own family.
Happy Mother’s Day to you too!!!
Karen of Sillymonkeez’s last blog post..Alphabet Photos (Letter J)
May 10th, 2008 at 1:05 am
Your mother is very lovely. You look very much like her. Happy Mother’s Day to both of you.
Eve’s last blog post..Dr. Report
May 10th, 2008 at 2:20 am
hi, just to wish you Happy Mother’s Day.
Hazel’s last blog post..Mother’s Day Fantasies
May 10th, 2008 at 5:03 am
Oh hon. That was just amazingly beautiful. I know it is important to hear the “I love you”s and feel the hugs and kisses, but sometimes actions speak louder than words.
Those photos are so amazing. I can actually SEE how proud your mother is of your in the photos. It is written all over her face.
Kathryn’s last blog post..Happy Mother’s Day!
May 10th, 2008 at 8:32 am
That was so touching! And happy Mother’s Day to you, too.
Karen’s last blog post..Is That A Train, Or The Light Of Day?
May 10th, 2008 at 8:40 am
Sandy, you made me cry with this lovely post. I get it, I so get it.
Your mother is beautiful, both inside and out … as is her gorgeous daughter.
Have a very Happy Mother’s Day!
Karen MEG’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen - Kids are the best Life Coaches
May 10th, 2008 at 9:10 am
I love this post, Sandy. She is a great mother and it’s amazing to read stories about great mothers. Love never fails. Happy mother’s day to you.
Jo-N’s last blog post..Mothers
May 10th, 2008 at 10:59 am
Great story! Happy Mom’s Day to you, too!
Burgh Baby’s last blog post..Raising a Burgh Baby the Right Way
May 10th, 2008 at 12:20 pm
You guys made it so hard to pick a winner! I was absolutely moved by the entries! I’m going to let others have the hard work of deciding who wins what next time!!! (As in for the Father’s Day one!)
Still looking for that polling widget!
May 10th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
Happy Mothers Day.. that is a beautiful photo of you and your mother on your wedding day… Just beautiful…
cheers kim
frogpondsrock’s last blog post..Funny thing, This blogging…
May 10th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
You made me cry. You won’t know why but this story got me.
Happy Mother’s day!
xoxox
Beth from The Funny Farm’s last blog post..Blogs Like His
May 11th, 2008 at 6:55 am
This was the BEST mother’s day post I’ve read. And the two of you are gorgeous. Gorgeous!!!
Angela’s last blog post..Thinking About Motherhood
May 11th, 2008 at 9:29 am
hi sandy,
you made me cry the whole way through. thanks for sharing. i, too, was brought up devoid mostly of hugs, kisses, and i love yous. but i chose not to repeat that cycle after i left home at 18. your story touched my heart. blessings, kathleen xo
**wiping away your tears**
so grateful to be mormon’s last blog post..a tender heart more content now
May 11th, 2008 at 4:20 pm
What a beautiful photo of your mom. I think there is something valuable about saying your feelings as well as showing them, but there is no underestimating how much actions matter. She took care of you so well–what a great mom.
Aurora’s last blog post..Sunday walk in the park
May 11th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
|I was here yesterday…but my internet got crazy! So posting my comments now…
I so heard you here! My Mom (well my parents…count my Dad too!) are just as affectionate as I wish they were…I think that is so Asian. But, as children, they may not have said ILY to us everyday but we surely feel their love for us in many ways…and I think that’s what matters!
I remember when I was a kid, I asked my Grandma (father side…so she’s Japanese) how to say ILY in Japanese…and she had to give me several versions and none of them meant ILY literally…how come? Well, they don’t say ILY! LOL
Happy Mother’s Day to you and your Mom!
Mariposa’s last blog post..Fun n’ Music on a Manic Monday!
May 11th, 2008 at 9:56 pm
beautiful!
wen’s last blog post..New Set of Outdoor Furniture
May 12th, 2008 at 1:31 am
What a sweet memory of your mom for you to keep. It’s true that Asian moms express themselves more by what they do than what they say.
Asianmommy’s last blog post..Happy Mother’s Day
May 12th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
Sandy, do you mind if I post this post in Tribute to Moms blog? This post is beautiful…
If you want to see the site first here’s the link
http://atributetomymom.blogspot.com/
http://atributetomydad.blogspot.com/
May 13th, 2008 at 9:29 pm
eerrr. not sure if my latest comment is received coz I can’t see it here.. but I was telling you that I want to publish this post to Tribute to Moms site.. if you don’t mind..
May 13th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
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May 18th, 2008 at 8:12 pm