A Half-Assed Disorder
Do you know a Half-Asser? Do you live with someone with ineptitude for any type of follow through?
From the looks of my place, someone living under this roof is surely afflicted with this disorder. I won’t say whom, nor will I point any fingers. But allow me to delineate some of the top 13 presenting signs and symptoms of living with a half-asser:
1) A load of laundry is washed, but the wet clothes remain in the washer for days until the smell of mildew flags you down to clean them again.
2) Clothes from the washing machine may actually be placed into the dryer. But 5-days later when underwear has run out, the tightly sealed dryer is finally opened to find damp, partially dried clothes.
3) Leftovers from a delicious, home-cooked meal are organized and stored securely in Gladware. A few weeks later, the food has re-hatched another entity within the plastic containers because someone never ate them.
4) Attempts were made to hang curtain rods securely to the wall. Initial measurements were slightly off leaving non-usable holes in the wall. 1-year later, the holes remain un-patched sitting right beside the beautiful drapery.
5) Dirty dishes are rinsed off and placed into the sink. 3 days later, they remain untouched, and are now filled with debris from other dirty plates rinsed off into them. And the dishwasher is empty.
6) 7,823 water bottles are scattered all over the house. All of them partially drank from by the same person.
7) All of the garbage bins around the house are fairly empty. But the perimeter of the floor around the bin is riddled with trash.
8 ) You’ve misplaced something that has never left the house. Someone offers to help search for it and eyeballs only the surfaces of 1 room and returns to say, “it must be gone forever.”
9) A toilet paper roll is empty. But a new, full roll of toilet paper sits right on top of the empty roll at all times (please refer to photo near title).
10) A full trash bin is taken out. But when something else is thrown away, it lands into a trash bin without a trash bag.
11) There are many trips to Borders and Barnes and Noble to purchase expensive books. Underneath a bed lies an entire library of books with bookmarks halfway through.
12) An adult purchases toys for themselves. Play with them until they break. But the boxes and the broken toys can still be found lying around years later.
13) Most clothing articles are hung up on hangers. The rest…well, they’re tossed up there:
If anyone has any information on how to help or medicate treat someone with this maddening disorder, please notify me immediately. Your help could make a difference in the sanity lives of many others.
Thank you.
That disease runs rampid at my home. Sadly, I have yet to find a cure. Consistent nagging and threats to not cook a certain someone’s favorite dinner until it is all resolved sometimes seems to lead to one task becoming partially accomplished.
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:55 pm
oh my goodness… i’ve just learned something from this post… i have half-assed disorder!!! hahaha… wow, it’s so sad that i do half of the things you mentioned. i forget clothes in the washer ALL THE TIME. and my husband feels like i’ve dominated the bottled water supply in our home because of all of the half-empty bottles. and i won’t even comment on the lovely leftovers in glad containers…
mama’s got moxie’s last blog post..at work, just wondering…
January 3rd, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Burgh Baby—Perhaps we can start group therapy….or even a support group?
Mama’s got moxie— Don’t worry. It’s contagious. I didn’t point fingers in my post because I have several symptoms of my own….like never getting past page 1 of my scrapbook for 2006 *sigh*. I just didn’t want to point fingers at myself, hehe. Doesn’t blogging count as scrapbooking, sort of?
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:07 pm
You just diagnosed the entire household of Porters. As new parents afflicted with this disorder, it has had disastrous consequences for our child.
Yes, it’s true. He has only one butt cheek. Oh, the shame!
imaginary sarah’s last blog post..Actual conversations, Part Three
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:17 pm
Ouch! Sounds like someone’s in trouble. I used to have half-assed disorder but I’ve been ‘trained’ out of it. There’s still hope for your household! =)
Daddy Dan’s last blog post..Presidential Primaries Kick Off Today
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:23 pm
Between her half an ass and my half an ass we have an ass and a half between us (due to the size of the half ass we each possess). Which usually means that the only way we get things done around our house is that she drags me into it. With the ass and a half we then share, things get done – until next time, which could be MONTHS later. Ugh. BTW, I think it’s cool you have the same closet organizing system we do – funny, though, how things wind up on the top shelf looking like they’ve just be thrown up there. You know it’s because that little step stool is just too far away from the door.
Hi, Sandy, how are you today? Seems like me and he have the same husbanditis disease. Later.
Lou Lohman’s last blog post..This ain’t so bad …
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:43 pm
Yikes, I just realized I forgot to TT today (that sounds bad, huh?). I was married to a half asser. I could never understand how he could find the exact middle point of any project and go no further.
m.o.M.’s last blog post..Ya Gotta Love the Directions!
January 3rd, 2008 at 3:52 pm
Are you sure my husband doesn’t live at your house?
My favorite (eyes rolling) thing at my house is the empty food wrapper on the counter two feet from the trashcan.
Get to know the Freaks and Geeks from I Read Banned Books over at my TT.
cajunvegan’s last blog post..Freaks and Geeks (TT 27)
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:04 pm
Oh my. HOW did you get into my house? And why didn’t you tell me you were coming? I’d've made you coffee!
alala’s last blog post..follow-up
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:30 pm
Guilty as charged.
I do put the toilet paper on the roll though, and put my dishes away.
Within 24 hours.
The laundry thing though (especially the dryer – not so much the washer), you’ve got me there.
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:37 pm
Okay…..when, and for how long have you been talking to my wife about me.
Nick’s last blog post..Just Kids: Remember When?
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:46 pm
SIGH. I’m guilty of some of those too. I am QUEEN of being too lazy to put a new roll of TP on the roller. Before I started using cloth diapers, I could get laundry into the dryer and actually DRY, but it’s SO convenient to turn the dryer on for 10 minutes in the morning, pull out something freshly fluffed to wear, and then do it all over again the next day, rather than go through the hassle of taking it OUT of the dryer, folding it, and putting it away.
The best idea my father ever came up with was to move the washer and dryer UPstairs. Because 1/2 the laziness with the laundry is moving it up and down the stairs. And the best idea that the Duggars ever had was to turn the laundry room into the family closet, so that clothes get hung up/put away RIGHT THERE in the laundry room. I am SO implementing that system when we move.
Courtney’s last blog post..Things I Accomplished on Day One of 2008
January 3rd, 2008 at 4:58 pm
a lot of that same kind of stuff happens at my house too. i solved the empty toilet paper problem though when I remodeled my bathroom… i bought one of those toilet paper holders with one open end! works like a charm!!
January 3rd, 2008 at 5:31 pm
oh my, this same thing occurs at my house. I’m also not pointing any fingers;however, a medication *cough* I mean treatment for this half-assness would be beyond awesome.
Manda’s last blog post..Initiating and Dropping Out of A Sorority
January 3rd, 2008 at 6:05 pm
I thought much of the half-assedness at my home belonged to my husband. However, he has been living at a nursing home for 8 months now and I haven’t noticed any significant improvement! How can this be? Gremlins. I have gremlins who come in a destroy my well-organized household when I’m not looking. That’s the only explanation.
Eve’s last blog post..New Year, New Look
January 3rd, 2008 at 6:25 pm
I love the comment about having an ass and a half between two people. That describes my house. Oh..oh…I think I had better go and check the laundry! Great Post!
Christine’s last blog post..Help Protect
January 3rd, 2008 at 6:47 pm
I’d say I’m a half/half asser. I have my moments of OCD!
Nap Warden’s last blog post..Winners, winners, winners!
January 3rd, 2008 at 6:55 pm
Who the HELL let you into my house with an effing camera?
Angela’s last blog post..Hindsight? Not Always 20/20
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:24 pm
Oh God, oh God! I’ve seen this place everyday of my life. I’ve just escaped this place this morning.
And now it’s right here, for all the world to see. I’ll sue you!
Bwahahahha. HAppy New Year, Sandy – and to your household, too.
zamejias’s last blog post..Thankful Thursday
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:39 pm
Nothing is worse than sitting down to do your business and finding that the last person didn’t replace the empty toilet paper roll. What is that about?
I think that’s some form of torture.
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:45 pm
ROFL! You all crack me up…
So glad that I’m, Ahem,…I mean, my husband isn’t alone!
Oh and you all talkin’ about those photos being in your house….that’s right! I’ve got eyes everywhere
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:46 pm
Kristi–…or worse…when there’s about 1-2 sheets left, and you have to try and use it. I shudder at the thought of it…..
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:47 pm
I have half-assed disorder! oH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Shhhhhhh don’t tell McHub. After 21 years he might not have figured it out yet……LOL.
JaniceNW’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen: Reasons Why I Am Not Too Old
January 3rd, 2008 at 7:59 pm
i think your closets is much more neater than mine..you can find my clothings on my bed and on the floor too.:)
sweetiepie’s last blog post..How do you feel you changed as being a mom
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:08 pm
I confess, I have the disease…is there a cure?
Diana’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen: Thirteen Books to Read in the New Year
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Thank goodnes it isn’t just our house. The laundry thing only takes about 12 hours before mold in Miami though. And we leave the toilet paper off the roll on purpose so the 2-year-old doesn’t just unroll it for fun (hey, sounds like a good reason, right?).
Ugh, but the empty food cartons on the kitchen counter when the garbage can is RIGHT THERE, and the dirty dishes in the living room the morning after the midnight snack, not that I’m pointing fingers either, but I could just strangle someone. but I’ll go by your example and try to be more goodnatured about it : )
Lisa Merritt’s last blog post..Wildcard Wednesday – Lincoln Center Christmas Tree
January 3rd, 2008 at 8:33 pm
I can imagine that. Well, if you can’t do anything about it, just get used to it.
JO-N’s last blog post..New Year Resolution
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:54 pm
i’m so relieved to know that there is a name for what is wrong with me but…is there a cure? 1-13…particularly, the toilet paper on top of the roll things, the mildew infested laundry, the toilet paper thingy and…the toilet paper thingy!!!
January 3rd, 2008 at 9:55 pm
I suffer from that disorder too. It must be hereditary because I think my sons have it, also.
AtomiK Kitten’s last blog post..Well that was easy…
January 3rd, 2008 at 10:04 pm
Um…is it possible we’re married to the same man? The trash thrown in the garbage can without a bag is a HUGE pet peeve…along with your other TWELVE items.
Now I feel better…thanks!!
grandy’s last blog post..New Adventures Part 1 – Blog for Money??
January 3rd, 2008 at 10:18 pm
Well, I’m newish here, but I had to comment on this one because the same thing tends to happen around here occasionally!! This cracked me up…thanks for the late-night laugh!!
Karen C.’s last blog post..My New Doctor
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:00 pm
I chuckled at many of these as they seem strangely familiar.
What a great idea for a TT list!
Nancy Bond’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #49
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:29 pm
I’m terribly startled by the fact that you must have sneaked into our house to get some of your pictures. I swear that’s our closet and toilet paper…
alejna’s last blog post..back home and such
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:32 pm
I have symptoms of my own, but it varies depending on whether school is in session or not. Loved the post, highly amused!
Happy blogging!
January 3rd, 2008 at 11:55 pm
Three. Number Three is definitely a problem in this house. Just today we were like, “What WAS this?” when we were cleaning out the containers in the fridge. Ew.
Episcopollyanna’s last blog post..My fitness goal by the end of March
January 4th, 2008 at 12:10 am
I always looked at it as skillful food archiving. And I prefer the more artistic term demi-asserie, thank you very much!
(These were hilarious – I do, have done, or would do any one of these)
BusyDad’s last blog post..My 2008 Try-To’s
January 4th, 2008 at 12:18 am
It’s not nice to come into my house, take pictures, and put them on the web without asking first.
Seriously, I think we share a family.
Mr Lady’s last blog post..We’ll see if I actually pull any of this off
January 4th, 2008 at 12:54 am
I think it is the life of a blogger to forever be the fantastic blogger but the horrible housekeeper. I would show you my mess but I would get in trouble.
Kerith Collins’s last blog post..JANUARY’S GIVEAWAY DRAWING PRIZE
January 4th, 2008 at 1:40 am
We simply don’t use the toilet paper roller no more. Just a stupid invention.
And if, then I’m the one with that disorder.
Hubby is more, uhm, the other way around
And no, I don’t think there’s a cure, but talking about it helps.
How about those cards I wanted to send, I did even write most of them, now there are in one of the drawers, ughh…..
January 4th, 2008 at 1:51 am
We’ve got it here, too! Most half-assed projects clutter our garage, and my laundry almost always sets in piles on the couch, half folded. Thanks for the real-life insight into your life!!
January 4th, 2008 at 1:58 am
Ohmygosh – did someone sneak in here with a camera when I wasn’t looking? Sigh — and I have no one to blame but Molly, the “tail wagging fur-kid who gets into everything” and little old me (the recovering pack-rat) with BOOKS PILED EVERYWHERE there’s a horizontal surface. Yup … that includes coffee tables, counters, and the floor folks (even the stairwell) even though every room in my house has floor to ceiling bookshelves filled with books. My house resembles a library, but I’m a voracious reader and have difficulty letting go of old friends as I write notes in the margins as I read. I know the bathroom and laundry room photos weren’t taken here and that’s a relief. Hang in there … hopefully plumbing problems are solved until you move!
Hugs and blessings,
storyteller’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #6
January 4th, 2008 at 6:14 am
lol. the toilet paper i think is the one that drives me battiest. look at you w/a million comments! wow! i would love to organize your closet (i have a thing with closets). i would start w/the hangers.
jameil1922’s last blog post..Fed Up: A Walk Through My Mindspace
January 4th, 2008 at 9:12 am
OMG.. I love this freaking post. I was staring a the toilet paper shot for five minutes just saying I HEAR YOUR PAIN.. I LIVE YOUR PAIN!!!
Great Post!
Kim’s last blog post..Piggy Pops – The Healthy Treat
January 4th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Is that what it’s called? A Half Asser?
Thank you so much for the tip. Now I know what to call my other half if he does things listed above!
andie summerkiss’s last blog post..Blog Surfing
January 4th, 2008 at 11:58 am
TOO. FUNNY.
You are a riot Sandy. I love the pic!
Karen MEG’s last blog post..Home Sweet Home
January 4th, 2008 at 12:25 pm
I could have written that!! I’ve got another to add – putting empty soda bottle next to the full bin instead of emptying it.
Hubby has half-assed disease in a hug way… You’d think that someone who was almost ocd-like with her cleanliness would have thought twice before marrying one but no! That’s true love i tell ya
Marylin’s last blog post..Friday’s Feast #2
January 4th, 2008 at 12:28 pm
alas I’m a half-asser and there is no cure, no treatment and no hope for our spouses. I’m an extreme case in that I half-ass my half-assing which makes me a quarter-asser. good for when I’m hanging out at the arcade waiting my turn on Mortal Combat VIII, bad for housework. Yes, Mortal Combat VIII is a turn on for me. What?
Bill’s last blog post..Oh What Fun It Is To Ride In A One Horse Open Slay
January 4th, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Shamefully admitting I am a half-asser sometimes. Whatever it takes to make it through the day!
Mommy Cracked’s last blog post..Thank You Jesus and Swiffer!
January 4th, 2008 at 2:30 pm
Oh, Dear Lord. You’ve been in my house. I’d recognize that closet anywhere. Unfortunatly it’s my half that looks like that. My hubby’s stuff is on the floor.
Kay’s last blog post..updated request
January 4th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
I think this list resembles me more than my other half! Well, maybe we’re equally half-assed, thus making us one big ass!
Jennic’s last blog post..His jolly self / Quote Tuesdays
January 4th, 2008 at 3:22 pm
ROFL!!!
You all are too darn clever with your half, quarter, and multi asses….
How do you keep up ??
I guess I’m just not mathematically inclined like that
January 4th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Oh my Lord. I always knew it was a disorder and now I know its name. I’m a half-asser too…
Damozel’s last blog post..Huck Puts Paid to the Prophecies of Right-Wing Pundits
January 4th, 2008 at 4:29 pm
I was going to post on this entry when I originally read it, but I refrained because I didn’t want to look like I was copycatting my sister. Her comment was the one before I would have made. If you scroll up to the post from Jeanne, I was going to mention her hook-for-a-thing-TP-holder (I helped her install it) and I should get one to solve that problem. Her comment was the one before I would have made.
Her & I go through these weird moments every once in while where we are thinking and doing the same stuff at the same time. We’ve had a few of those lately. I told her one of us needs to blog about it because it happened again the other day when we both had the same problem pressing the correct button when answering the phone and hung up on each other.
Bonnie’s last blog post../geek
January 4th, 2008 at 7:39 pm
…the sky has just opened above, rays of light breaking through the grey clouds, as the voices of angels break out in a chorus of ‘Alleluias’… Praise the Momisode for raising the veil from my eyes and helping me to see that we are not alone!!!!!! I feel the calling to start a HalfAssed Anonymous….mmmmm, or not!
Great post!
RiceWenchie’s last blog post..National WHAT Month?
January 4th, 2008 at 11:15 pm
*goes very very quiet*
Ummmm, maybe I can pass the blame onto another certain someone in my house?
I am a useless housewife.
Veronica’s last blog post..The Hardest Thing I Have Ever Done
January 4th, 2008 at 11:18 pm
ROFLOL…Thank you for that. If I smoked, I’d go light one up after that–it was THAT good.
January 5th, 2008 at 12:36 am
I’m glad to say I’m not guilty of any of those.
nicholas’s last blog post..Thursday Thirteen #39
January 5th, 2008 at 1:11 am
I do NOT have half-assed disorder. I do NOT have half-assed disorder. I do NOT have half-assed disorder. I do NOT have half-assed disorder. I do NOT have half-assed disorder…
*I still believe*
LOL! Thanks for the add on 365 days of blogging. Found you through that. =) Adding you to my blog roll too. Enjoyed your writing.
Bonita in Pink’s last blog post..Blog for a whole year!?
January 5th, 2008 at 3:23 pm
OMG, i laughed so hard i think i pee’d a little. everyone in my house suffers from this disease except for me – i have menopause!
Briggie’s last blog post..Scattegories – Bloggity Style
January 6th, 2008 at 10:06 pm
I stumbled here by accident but will stick around!
January 13th, 2008 at 1:12 am
This blog is hysterical! I found it through BusyDad – I’ll definitely be back!
Jen of a2eatwrite’s last blog post..Downs and Ups
January 25th, 2008 at 7:00 pm
OMG… Busy Dad sent me over here… this is cracking me up!! I, too, live with a half-assed husband. Proof:
http://missivesfromsuburbia.blogspot.com/2007/12/e-for-effort.html
Deb (Missives From Suburbia)’s last blog post..Just One More Cool Phrase
January 25th, 2008 at 9:44 pm
It’s even worse when the TWO of us do the same thing. I think you took the pics in my house.
January 25th, 2008 at 11:34 pm
My name is Jill and I am a recovering half-asser. I have made great strides in my recovery efforts but it’s a struggle every day to follow tasks through to completion. God bless my husband. He has stuck with me through piles of laundry, messy closets and foul produce drawers. Thank goodness he hasn’t photographed any of my transgressions. I would be so ashamed.
Jill’s last blog post..HOW DO YOU LIKE ME NOW?!
January 26th, 2008 at 11:24 am