Archive for the ‘pregnancy’ Category

If I sang, will this be over?

Tuesday, March 9th, 2010

If one more person asks me if I am still pregnant…

I’m going to cry.

Or polish off a quart of Breyers mint chocolate chip ice cream.

Every time I’m asked.

Anyway, the past couple of days have been a bit rough.

I went from having contractions every 10-15 minutes, to every 5 minutes. Many of them quite strong and painful.  This has happened everyday since Friday, lasting for a few hours on and off.

By the end of each day I feel like I’ve run a marathon because of the constant contractions and breathlessness.

This is definitely not how things unfolded with Babisodes four years ago.  With her, I had mild contractions for a few days, my water broke, and once I couldn’t bear the pain any longer, we swung by Panda Express on the way to the hospital so I could grab a bite to eat (since I knew they wouldn’t feed me until after she was born).

This time around, my body wants me to suffer.

I finally called my doctor today to get myself checked out, and I am a whopping two centimeters dilated.

If you are unfamiliar with the stages of labor, 2 cm’s is not a big deal. At least not for the activity that I’ve had recently.  Most hospitals admit woman when they are about 4 cm’s or if their water has broken.  A baby is delivered at 10 cm’s.

By this time during my last pregnancy, I had already been 3 cm’s for over a week (with little to no pain), and it took another week and a half before my daughter was born.

If this kid wants to cook inside for another week or so, fine.

But enough with the bluffing already.

Belly-37.5weeks-BlogWM
37.5 weeks

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How to get a complex via mail

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

I am always amazed at the mailing lists I end up on.

Like when I turned 30, and some jackass thought it was appropriate to send me an AARP application.

Thirty!

Or last year when a Golden Girls-esque wig catalog arrived on my doorstep, addressed to moi.

Shimmery, permed kind of wigs (click above link to see the scariest blond Asian woman ever).

Last month I even received an American Express Black Card application in the mail.  Did you know they have an annual fee of $2,500?

Think they’re aware I paid for a coffee and $1 menu apple pies in quarters at McDonalds today?

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