I never wanted this to happen.  My skills at juggling life have proven to be more underdeveloped than I thought.

Like a high school girl dating a new guy, I was weak.

On March 21st, my world suddenly shifted off of it’s axis and began revolving around my new baby girl.  Flowers were suddenly in bloom.  Birds sat perched outside my window, serenading a beautiful tune. And my heart yearned to spend every waking (and half-waking) moment with my baby.  Holding her.  Loving her.

Once she came into my life, everything became a pink and lavender haze.  Her feedings, breast pumps, Babisodes’ adjustment, laundry, meals, preschool- all of these were suddenly thrown in my direction to juggle daily.  As a result, my relationships with friends and family were unintentionally tossed aside.

Subconsciously, I put blinders on, allowing me to focus.

Forward.  Ahead.

It is the only direction I’ve seen in the last month. Particularly since everything appears to move in fast-forward.  Hours turn into seconds. What’s for lunch? Do we have clean laundry for tomorrow?

Despite how idle it has been on this blog, behind the scenes, I have been fully engaged in motherhood.  But not a day goes by where I don’t wish I had the time to document all of the ordinary things going on right now that I know will make me smile in a few years.  I reminisce about the time when I could capture my life through words on this blog. When this blog, and all of you, were my shoulders to cry on, my buddies to laugh with, confidants to seek advice from.

But I’ve been distracted.

Every morning, the baby’s tiny tucked body fills my arms more, widening my embrace.  In her new role as ‘big sister’, Babisodes has begun to demand more autonomy each day, even though it is unwarranted.

In a blink of an eye, over a month has slipped away.  And as I take a moment to pause, I realize I have reached that transitional point in any relationship when the honeymoon phase has passed.   The point where I am so sleep deprived, I could pack a much needed vacation’s worth of luggage into the bags beneath my eyes; when the baby’s sweet smell is really just sour milk and vomit; when those damn birds outside need to shut the hell up because it’s 4 o’clock in the morning.

When reality sets in and the world of pink and lavender suddenly transforms to an uneasy shade of ‘holy crap-I-actually-have-two-kids’.

The point where I wish I had an old friend to chat with, or a place to retreat, so I could just complete a thought.

A friend like you.  A place just like this.

My closest friends in life are the ones who have been able to pick up right where we left off, no matter how much time passes between phone calls, emails or visits.  They are the ones who have stood the test of time.

I would love to consider you one of them.

Because I have so much I want to tell you.

Check out Beth Miga’s photography blog post for more delicious photos of Babisodes 2.0… or Bittysodes…or Youngersodes.   I cannot thank her enough for her amazing photography skills.   If you are anywhere near the Boston area, you should definitely consider her to photograph you and/or your wee ones.  She is awesome.

Can you tell I still have yet to settle on a name for the baby?  HALP!